Dangers in International Dating

List any good dating websites that you know or suggest good places to meet people.
Goshen26
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Nigeria

Dangers in International Dating

Postby Goshen26 » Tue Aug 15, 2017 6:41 am

International Dating is very good, because it promote international relationship, allows bilateral trade of culture, belief and religion. But it can also be dangerous. There are some folks that have been exposed to some dangers attached to it.

1. Cultural belief: African culture permits a woman/lady to be submissive to his guy, but western belief takes it as modern slavery. I mean a woman who feel that she has gender equality should not dear try it dating a chronic African man, because the aftermath of such relationship tends to be brutal.

We have seen many homicides that resulted from two people, who have different culture. An African man will expect his girl to greet him first in the morning, failure for her to that will result into rancor.

2. Language Barrier: The best international relationship is when both parties are of the same language i.e Francophone/Francophone, Portuguese/Portuguese etc. No matter how you learn a language you can not understand the deep meaning of some expressions, and this often cause misunderstanding.

3. Religious understanding: An african believe that he/she has to pray in the morniing before anything. Dating a spouse that believe other wise will raise problem.



I will not want to make this thread lengthy, so views can have point to add, because i want it to be a discussion.



dhovorka
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Austria

Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby dhovorka » Wed Oct 11, 2017 1:59 am

Well yes, a complex topic and many aspects to be considered. I want to share one aspect which might be to considered and relevant whoever comes into the position of dating someone from another country. In many countries female or male are only interested to gain access to a stronger passport. What does this mean?

For example, a man with a passport from Morocco has a lot of limitations to travel without applying for a Visa before travel. If he would marry a European woman he has access to a European passport. This is only for his personal advantage and has nothing to do with love or interested into a longterm relationship. I personal have seen cases like this, after marriage they even disappear and travel on their own for business or whatever.

Marriage means in a lot of countries not love, so consider this as given that in some culture it is a goal to marriage into a wealthy family.

DR KOKIL AGARWAL
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Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby DR KOKIL AGARWAL » Fri Nov 03, 2017 10:47 pm

This answer is based on my personal experience. One of my close relatives started dating a US based girl. They met on a social media site and then became close friends. To such a great extent that the girl travelled overseas to meet the boy and his family. A year later they got married and both of them settled in US.

Little did we all know about the hidden motives of the boy. All the love, affection and concern were nothing more than a filmy drama. He had married the girl only to clear the visa requirements to get into the country and then get a green card. I was stunned to hear that years later when he got a green card, he called off the relationship.

Since then, I always look down upon international dating. Even if the person is true, I always take it very suspiciously.

mildredtabitha
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Kenya

Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby mildredtabitha » Fri Nov 03, 2017 11:33 pm

Since you have focused more on the African culture, I believe some of the rules mentioned in the original post doesn't apply. The modern African man is very open minded and doesn't allow cultural beliefs to put a strain on his future family or current relationship.

I have seen many African men intermarrying and others bringing home the "white girl". The marriage lasts because of communication and not letting cultural beliefs control it. :D

So I believe times have changed. The western people and African people can date and even intermarry.

TingJ
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Philippines

Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby TingJ » Sat Nov 04, 2017 12:15 am

This is based on a true story.

I have a friend who is a gay. He belonged to a poor family. In order for him to elevate his economic status, he established a relationship to a certain person from abroad. This foreigner sent him a money. Later on, the latter went into the Philippines. Without my friend's knowledge, the foreigner was also a gay and has a secret. Eventually, they met and maybe they did some romantic activities.

Years had passed, my friend had HIV Aids. He told his family that he got it from his foreigner boyfriend. According to him, he made love with that person. Now, my friend is dead. He passed away last January 2017.

Well, I think, the situation may happen to someone else irregardless of citizenship. My point here is that because of the financial problem of a person, many think that dating with the foreigner is a solution to the problem. Not to generalize, this case lingers to another problem.

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jy76
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United States of America

Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby jy76 » Wed Apr 25, 2018 7:45 am

There is a lot of hostility toward other races in certain parts of the west. I mean, where I live at there is quite a bit of harassment, though, nothing dangerous. In fact, an interracial couple was driven out of my Tennessee valley. But then again, this is a very remote valley and the more rural a place is, the more racist. For instance, even in a small city, people are more open minded and interracial couples are more prevalent (but in certain ones there is still some pretty harsh teasing like comments and mean things written).

Kieranlewix
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Kenya

Re: Dangers in International Dating

Postby Kieranlewix » Wed Apr 25, 2018 8:18 am

Goshen26 wrote:International Dating is very good, because it promote international relationship, allows bilateral trade of culture, belief and religion. But it can also be dangerous. There are some folks that have been exposed to some dangers attached to it.

1. Cultural belief: African culture permits a woman/lady to be submissive to his guy, but western belief takes it as modern slavery. I mean a woman who feel that she has gender equality should not dear try it dating a chronic African man, because the aftermath of such relationship tends to be brutal.

We have seen many homicides that resulted from two people, who have different culture. An African man will expect his girl to greet him first in the morning, failure for her to that will result into rancor.

2. Language Barrier: The best international relationship is when both parties are of the same language i.e Francophone/Francophone, Portuguese/Portuguese etc. No matter how you learn a language you can not understand the deep meaning of some expressions, and this often cause misunderstanding.

3. Religious understanding: An african believe that he/she has to pray in the morniing before anything. Dating a spouse that believe other wise will raise problem.



I will not want to make this thread lengthy, so views can have point to add, because i want it to be a discussion.

I appreciate your theory on the dangers of international marriage. However, since you have focused mainly on Africans, I would like to clear up some of the misconceptions. I happen to be Kenyan. First, you have mentioned the cultural difference. It is true that Africans and Westerners have very different cultures. I don't see this as a danger though. It is actually interesting to learn about each others beliefs and cultures. Cultural integration is definitely better than monotony, don't you think?
You have so mentioned language barrier as a danger. Most African countries happen to have been colonised by the British. As a result, we understand and speak English eloquently. I don't think American and British English are that far off from each other. As for religious differences, I do agree that it can be a danger.


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